the grey skies
now outnumber the sunny
dropped in for
a visit they did – which was cool
but when they
moved in to stay
when my back
was turned - without even asking
as welcome as
an old-college, couch-surfing friend
you gotta
wonder – how long clouds? How long?
and the river
flows
then the
temperature dropped from beneath my feet
and now - what
the fuck?
I’ve got to
wear socks
cause the
river flows
this really
isn’t happening is it?
where did all
the leaves go?
like the
poignant moments at the end of a summer romance
they flared up
all red and yellow and seared into my heart
and I told
that lie again
that I would
never forget
wanting to
believe I could hold onto that beauty forever…
but the river
flows
the wild north
winds tore those coloured leaves from my fingers
the rain, the
rain, the rains pelted
transforming
the river where I swam to cool the summer’s heat
to think I
welcomed how it stole the day’s hot fun and cooled my bones
washed away
the salty sweat of outdoor sex
as the river
flows
Now those
lifegiving waters have turned on me
a plunge in
them sucks the air from my lungs
and my brain
shifts from lazy dazed philosophies
to sudden
single-mindedness
I NEED TO
BUILD A FIRE- INDOORS
and recover
from this cold-hearted, life-sucking loss of teenage passions
wrap myself in
wooly clothes and wooden walls to hold the heat inside
while the
river flows
the prospect
of winter
gives a young
soul new purpose
sex n drugs n
rock n roll
must now be
scheduled to fit within
the work of
working
til work will
work it out
into a plan
for shoveling
snow
to dig for
gold
to get to work
to find the
way
to help each
other
work it out to
buy
a better
bigger shovel
to clear the
way
to get to work
to wonder why
I forgot to
pray
for help to find
a better way
to work
my heart and
mind
and body and
soul
into a holy
flaming
work of
art-some making
instead of
faking the great great
birth of god
hidden within
the tv’s
heatless fire
sucking the
life from
all the work
it takes
to just get by
to try to find
the fire that
won’t go out
as the river
flows
the river
knows
I don’t like
to lose
but can’t
avoid the game
and all the
gear it takes to keep what’s warm inside my soul
from freezing
out - in the great outdoors
the ones who
get pushed aside
forgotten in
my rush to work it out,
to just get
past this cold cold time
to get to the
end of the story
the end of the
rainbow
when spring
will solve all my worries
when the nuts
I’ve stored, and got to know, will finally run out
and my Hope
will last until that day when She returns
in the river’s
flow
but here I am
not there not
then
I can’t
remember so I can’t begin
the summer’s
gone, the winter’s closing in
I’ve fallen
still
my work is
done
so instead
I’ll play
with the angel
who’s arrived just now
we’ll put our
hands into the Maker’s making
of turning
seasons neverending
let an ancient
fire burn away our heart’s desire
the comforts
and the claims
the answers
and the gains
and we’ll
spread those ashes artfully
upon the
river’s flow
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